Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Very Married

I've been going through a lot in the last month or so.  It's been a challenge but I'm so lucky to have someone in my life that cares enough to see through my 'I'm OKs' and 'I't's All Good's'.  That's my husband.  Before him I would have sworn up and down that no man can really know when something is off about their woman.  That no man pays that much attention or puts much thought into what his woman does.

My guy is an observer. He watches, he waits, he listens and then acts. Sometimes it irks me that he doesn't respond to my questions right away or he doesn't act immediately upon seeing me slam a door.  But after two years of marriage I get it.  I'm getting the hang of this marriage thing and am learning new things about him/us everyday.  This is not to say I'm figuring this all out through my own genius.  No...we've had some long nights that began with me saying, 'Let's talk about...'  God bless him, he sighs and then tries to give me what I want.  A lot of times those talks are me jabbering on and on and him nodding and saying nothing more than 'uh-huh'.  If I get frustrated with his lack of response I stop talking.  Several minutes can go by with neither of us saying a thing.  This usually ruffles my feathers a bit more before he launches into comments about most everything I've said.  Some comments are not what I want to hear but if I'm patient (and quiet) I get to the part where I appreciate that he listened, commented and was honest about it all.

Because of who he is, I've become comfortable sharing things with him.  It was with a heavy heart and head that I finally sat down and shared my thoughts with him.  It's been a month of thinking about my Mom and how I miss being able to talk over my problems with her.  I've recently had four friends announce their pregnancy this month alone.  While happy for them, it brought me down just a bit.  Our budget recently took a big hit and I'm staring at the dent it made as the month draws to a close.  He listened and was quiet after I finished.  Then he pulled me into a hug and let me cry.  He stayed with me that way until I cried myself to sleep.  He didn't have to say a word.  He was just there for me.  It's moments like this that let's me know I chose the right man for me.

I woke the next morning with a lighter heart and head and a smile to boot.  On my way out he hugged me and said, 'Have a good day.  Concentrate on work and think about me if you need to smile.  Don't play at the gym; go there and make a difference.  When you are done, I'll be here waiting for you.'  When I got to work I received a text saying, 'God loves you.  I love you.  Let the heavy things go.  We are there for you.'  Now tell me I didn't choose a great guy!  I've said it before and I'll say it again.  Being single was great. I enjoyed it and learned a lot about myself. Being married is nothing I expected and everything I wanted.  I always referred to Ms. Hepburn's quote when me and my girls talked of marriage.

“If I get married, I want to be very married.” ― Audrey Hepburn.

I feel very  married.  Goodnight!

***Hopefully I'll get back in the groove of posting and try not to have them all about my gym experience (although I enjoy talking about the struggle). I have some half finished drafts and several pics of my food experience that I think deserves to be posted.  

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